Carol Es

In 1975 I was gearing up towards one of my life's greatest ambitions: collecting bicentennial quarters. I thought if I could gather enough of these otherwise unremarkable coins, I'd soon after be able to purchase my own Volkswagen bus and drive myself away from my dysfunctional family at rip-roaring speeds of 38 miles per hour.

Alas, I didn't get away until age 14 when the damage was already done hardwired into my psyche and forever imprinted onto my brain. It's quite like a stamp that reads, "doom" that might as well be printed in permanent ink across my forehead. So I make art to pass the time until I find a magical eraser that removes this word off my face, along with giving me fresher, younger-looking skin.

I grew up in Los Angeles and have been making art most of my life. I can not think of doing anything else. I am no good at working at a fast food counter or talking to people, nor am I any good at sex or sales. I am most interested in making my ideas into art things, and when I can't, I am unbearably miserable and cry a lot.

I tend to revisit my childhood in my work. The imagery comes to me in the weird moments before falling asleep. Somewhere in my method of expressing myself, I find positive resolutions to my inner turmoil and hope it gives the world a little peace as well.